Sunday, April 14, 2013

Never Say Never

I know it's a bit cliched. I should have known better, though. I learned very early in my life that the expected isn't something I should ever expect. I learned to hope and pray for the best possible scenario, but to prepare, and prepare well, for the worst possible scenario. Some confuse this with being pessimistic. That's so very far from the truth, at least with me it is. if I fail to prepare for the worst, then I am unable to deal with it in any way.

A little under eight years ago I had surgery on my left foot. At that point, I had fractured three times in three years. My podiatrist at the time, Dr. Russo, and I were under the impression that this would help to correct my gait (along with physical therapy, of course). If my gait could be corrected. the possibility of another fracture would decrease. He removed some joints but didn't remove the big joint in my big toe. I was only 29 at that time and we wanted to see if we could correct it, but keep that big joint. He removed three joints in my middle three toes and fused those bones together. While the healing took longer than anyone would have liked it to, the surgery seemed to to be a success.
I didn't fracture my foot again for five years. That seemed like a win to me.

In 2010, I fractured my third metatarsal. I was in a walking cast (the boot) for about four months. At the time, we were pretty sure the fracture happened because I was favoring my right knee. Now, I'm not sure if it was the right knee messing up my left foot, or my left foot messing up my right knee.
In 2011 I had a synovectomy and some other surgical stuff done to my right knee. About a week before that, I fractured my left foot again. At this point, I was using a cane for both my right knee and my left foot. My balance was shot and i was in enough pain to last me for a while. After the knee surgery, it took another three months for my foot to heal.

In August of 2012, I fractured my third metatarsal again. While I was in the boot, I somehow managed to fracture two other bones in my left foot (the middle and lateral cuneiforms). This type of fracture is relatively rare, and usually only happens when something has been done to a metatarsal. The fact that it happened while I was being treated for a metatarsal injury was the only typical thing about this break. When they did yet another MRI on the left foot, they found swelling in the bones (not the joints, the bones) and some smallish bone spurs. That's when they put a short leg cast on and I got to use crutches for two months. In the middle of winter. in Central New York. Everyone should try this at least once in their lifetime.
First day of cast

My boys and miss adeline

I find it awesome that my converse matched my cast shoe :)

After the cast was removed, I was still in a lot of pain, so another MRI was ordered. They couldn't see anything new. Still with the bone spurs and additional swelling (now in my ankle as well). I was referred to a Lower Extremity Ortho. While I was waiting the few weeks to be seen by him, I found myself praying and asking for prayer for a resolution. A way to get rid of, at least, a little of the pain. I just want to be in the amount of pain I was in until last August. So that's what I got. A resolution.
I will be having another surgery. This time a Complex Forefoot Reconstruction. It's pretty much the same surgery I had done before, just more extensive. They will be removing more joints, including that big toe joint. They will be fusing more bones and shaving off some bone spurs. If other stuff is found while they are in there, they will try to fix that as well. They will be staying away from my ankle for now. If I'm still having trouble with that after this surgery, there is talk about ankle surgery, possible replacement. Again, I'm really young for this sort of thing, but if it needs to happen, it will.

When I had that first foot surgery, I said I would never have another foot surgery again. It hurt. Bad. Almost as bad as the jaw surgery I had when I was 16. I understand the necessity though. I haven't had a foot that allowed me to walk without pain for quite some time. I have an eight year old who needs my body to be working. So I'm diving in again. I have confidence in my doctor to do well with the surgery and any surprises that may pop up. I have confidence in myself, that I will be able to do what needs to be done in the healing process. I have the most confidence in my husband and son to help out with all the extra stuff at home for just a little while longer.

I don't yet know when the surgery will take place, but I'll keep everyone updated. Once again I ask for prayer and happy thoughts. Praying that this surgery will do what it's supposed to, so i can do what I feel I'm supposed to.

Looks like my garden reconstruction will have to be held off for just a little while longer...

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